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  #1  
Old Posted Aug 17, 2010, 10:52 PM
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Package with cow tongue puts kink in morning trains

http://www.statesman.com/news/local/...ng-863161.html

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MetroRail service was disrupted Monday morning after a package containing a cow tongue embedded with nails, a note and a photograph was found between the tracks in East Austin.

Just after 7 a.m., a passerby noticed the package, wrapped in white butcher paper with red tape on it, sitting on the railroad ties between the rails about 100 feet west of Fifth and Chicon streets, Capital Metro spokesman Adam Shaivitz said. As a precaution, Capital Metro truncated the runs of the several remaining morning southbound trains so that they would not pass the spot where the parcel was found and canceled the one remaining northbound train from the downtown station...

A beef tongue about a foot long was wrapped in the paper, and the meat was studded with nails. There was also a glass jar nearby with an unidentified liquid in it, Jones said. The butcher paper had a message on the inside that included a series of names and a series of unpunctuated words: "Against us stop now close the mouth."

...Public incidents elsewhere involving displays of beef tongues, sometimes with nails or photos, have been linked with Santería , a religion that combines aspects of Christianity with traditional West African beliefs.

Miguel De La Torre, author of the book "Santería: The Beliefs and Rituals of a Growing Religion in America," cautioned that whoever put together the package might not be a practitioner of Santería. But if so, De La Torre said, the meat could be an offering to Ogun, a god of war but also of metal who believers say often resides on railroad tracks...
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  #2  
Old Posted Aug 18, 2010, 1:48 AM
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I love how they said the cow tongue showing up there that day didn't have anything to do with new head of CapitalMetro starting her job that day.
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  #3  
Old Posted Aug 18, 2010, 5:40 PM
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Does anyone know where Mike Dahmus was early Monday morning? This sounds like his work.
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  #4  
Old Posted Aug 18, 2010, 7:43 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by The Lorax View Post
Does anyone know where Mike Dahmus was early Monday morning? This sounds like his work.
HI LARIOUS.

817 boardings/day for July, by the way. Without cow tongue interference.
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  #5  
Old Posted Aug 18, 2010, 10:17 PM
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Would it be wrong if we started a round of puns?

I'll start:

CapitalMetro has been licked.
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  #6  
Old Posted Aug 18, 2010, 11:41 PM
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Take a "lap "around town on CapMetro....They claim to mooooove people...
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  #7  
Old Posted Aug 19, 2010, 3:48 AM
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I think we reached the end of the line on these puns...
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  #8  
Old Posted Aug 19, 2010, 5:05 AM
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It's a good thing they didn't put the tongue on the tracks in the winter time because it would have stuck.
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  #9  
Old Posted Aug 19, 2010, 5:41 AM
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Early reports that the spiky package was discovered by a homeless man who sat down to rest between the tracks were later called "tongue in cheek".
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  #10  
Old Posted Aug 19, 2010, 6:03 AM
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Cow tongues on train track puns are fun until everyone gets on board and starts making up puns that are in bad taste. A bad taste that is similar to if you licked a train track.
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  #11  
Old Posted Aug 19, 2010, 4:55 PM
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When friends told the new Cap Metro CEO she'd have to deal with tacky bovine in Austin... she figured they meant Bevo!

Ok, I'll stop now.

Hope Stephan Pastis is watching, this stuff is "Pearls Before Swine" quality right here.
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  #12  
Old Posted Aug 20, 2010, 1:02 AM
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We could keep these puns going till the cows come home (hopefully with tongues).
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  #13  
Old Posted Aug 20, 2010, 2:19 PM
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These cow tongue puns are -udderly- ridiculous.
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  #14  
Old Posted Aug 21, 2010, 2:26 AM
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Speaking of puns on the forum, 2 years ago there had been some strange incidences of human feet washing up on beaches around Vancouver, Canada. I forget how many were actually found, and honestly it was a gruesome situation I'm sure, but the puns in that thread were gold.

http://forum.skyscraperpage.com/showthread.php?t=146009
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  #15  
Old Posted Aug 21, 2010, 2:29 PM
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If these puns don't stop I'm going to have a cow.

Sorry.
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