Good stuff so far.
Ottawa
Have helicopter land on parliament hill for added dramatic effect..Announce your arrival.
Head a bit East from hill and head to American embassy..Tell them that you are a friend of Razor's, and you need another $20.00...If you are American, then someone there may be from your home town, so again gain another $20.00...Any other nationality, well one of your embassy's may be on Sussex close to the hill, so let's say everybody gets $20.00 extra ..good?
Next..Take care of business, so if it's a warm summer night pick out a tree in Major Hill's park for your crash spot for later, or check into a homeless shelter..Either the Mission or Sheppard's of good hope..Then grab a free meal from either of these two homeless shelters.Your timing is perfect..Dinner is from 5:00- 7:00 (I think from my volunteer days).
Next, Buy a lawn chair at the GT boutique in the market ($10.00), and we'll assume it's bluesfest season, so hit up the liquor store and buy a few king cans ($ 20.00 for 5 or so ), and hoof over to bluesfest (20 minute walk west) to Lebreton flats..or, jump in the back of bus jam packed with patrons going to bluesfest (free if you slip through back door)..Catch bus from Rideau street literally 5.0 minutes away from where you snagged lawn chair...
Park lawn chair outside of bluesfest fence along Albert street and keeping beer low,enjoy the free concerts from outside with other people doing the same making some friends and smoke some hippie lettuce along the way (if that's your thing)..Watch for cops though..they leave the "free" concert gazers alone, but won't tolerate the drinking in public,so keep King cans low..
When you had enough, ditch lawn chair or give it to one of the people you met outside the "free" fence..Don't attempt to sell it cheap azz..It's just bad kharma.
Jump the bus back to the market..It's real busy, so again hop on the back door..The "bus marshalls" leave these buses alone during bluesfest.
Cruise the market, and people watch..If it's a nice summer night, there will be tourists galore, so find an outdoor patio..I would suggest the Highlander pub, and again make some friends..Generally, other tourists are real friendly, and will invite you to their table after a bit of conversation,especially if they find out you are alone and got dropped off by a helicopter a few hours earlier..Buy a pitcher of Guiness, house brand, Rickards or whatever, and share with your new friends...Another $20.00.
Trip on down to Chases diner and buy some diner food, buy a burrito from "Burrito Burancho", or a smoked meat Sammie from Dunn's .All good choices...Another $15.
All told, you spent $65.00 tonight..$55.00 remaining.
Turn in either at the shelters or that tree you spied earlier..Either way, you can cop a free shower in the morning at a shelter.
Saturday, day 2...Grab free breakfast from mission or coffee and muffin from Macdonalds.
Walk around parliament hill and take free tour. Spend $20 on Ottawa river boat tour, or walk across the river (bridge duh!) to the Quebec side and check out the Museum of civilization..Either way, they will set you back $20.00.
I would be more for the boat tour though..More chillax, and you get a seat for a few hours.
It's near lunch time, so cop another free, albeit bland meal from one of the shelters.
if you have roller blades in your pack sack, cruise up the canal on the paved path, checking out the scenery along the way..Come back and spend $20.00 on a few pints at the LAFF..Lucky Ron and his acoustic will keep you entertained starting at 4:00.
Grab free meal at shelter time, nap under tree and head up Elgin street to night club district...
Don't drink ..Tell Bartenders that you are DD, so get free pop or lime and sodas and rave away making new friends along the way..You are down to $15.00, so buy poutine at Elgin street diner...Explain to dude with scruffy beard that you can't leave tip ..Explain your situation..He'll get it...Trip on down to tree or free bed at shelter.
Wake up with $2.00 left...Score free meal, and Macdonald's coffee.
Walk up to the Iranian Embassy on Metcalfe (half hour walk), jump fence and take them hostage..See how those bastards like it!...Either that or throw them for a loop..Tell them that you want to seek refuge in Iran, then laugh and walk away.
radio in copter..Your done.
Last edited by Razor; Jul 19, 2014 at 11:17 PM.
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