[Manitopiaaa]

Originally Posted by jbermingham123

Soon-to-be-breaking news:

-Beijing requests to build a new consolate in Phoenix: "The Chinese people have always had a very special connection to.. *checks notes* ..Arizona," a CCP spokesperson says

-Huawei proposes deal to provide 5G internet access to the new semiconductor plants at below market value: "nah we won't record any of their data.. we promise" they said

-Chinese tourism in Phoenix doubles in the span of a single year: "Its very strange, they all seem to be from beijing and nowhere else," says local customs official

-Chinese space agency launches new "climate research" satellite into geostationary orbit at Arizona's longitude: "The mojave desert is like super neat, with a lot of very nice sand and rocks and such. Definitely not looking at anything other than the desert" the agency says.

Lmao.